And here we go with another zombie Christmas shopping frenzy

It’s Christmas again, and that means another zombie shopping frenzy at the local mall.

The Zombie Christmas Maul
The Zombie Christmas Maul

It’s the same every year (just like my posts whinging about them). As far as I am concerned even at the best of times malls are vampires that suck money and will-to-live.

Shopping in the mall for me consists of hurtling into the place, picking up essential bloke stuff (beer, power tools). Then getting out. Fast.

Come Christmas these places turn into zombie machines – ghastly spaces filled with ridiculous tinsel and fake Christmas cheer that turn everyday people into endless hordes of once-were-humans, the shopping dead who amble vacantly in witless circles, slack mouths breathing that dread word  – ‘credit caaaaaaard…’, all the while surrounded by chintzy gifts that are ‘made to sell’ and which break 28 seconds after being opened, but who cares because they sold which is the purpose of it all, and – and – Bah humbug!

Copyright © Matthew Wright 2015


18 thoughts on “And here we go with another zombie Christmas shopping frenzy

  1. And here we have all that AND icy, snowy roads. Forget about the mall, I went to the library yesterday and feared returning alive because zombies also drive. In the end, the culture that encourages consumption eventually consumes itself. I’m about production. Want to give me a present? Make me something.

    1. I agree. Something you’ve made contains so much more thought and care – all for the recipient – than an anonymous consumer ‘thing’ bought in an anonymous store in an anonymous mall.

  2. I concur whole-heartedly!
    Our climate is ridiculous here as well, and while we don’t have much snow (yet) it’s super icy with all the weird thaws that are happening. Zombies do drive!
    I’ve avoided our mall & our large department stores like the plague for the last 10 years, and manage to only make one trip a year (for Christmas shopping) usually.
    This year, it’s my goal to not set foot inside the horror. I have 3 gifts left, and I’m hoping to buy them all locally. As much as I like to think this is my way of supporting a local economy – it really is my way of avoiding large hoards of zombies😛

  3. I have had the ‘pleasure’ of serving them for 20 years in my previous career and came to the same conclusions. Stay away! Shopping addiction is the result of a successful media induced brainwash, that makes people believe that it makes them happy and there is some therapeutic benefit to it.
    To avoid turning into a zombie, I now go away over Christmas, a long way from civilization and reconnect with the real gift, that of Nature.
    PS: I agree with Ontyrepassages, that anything made by the giver has so much more value for it carries the love with which it was made.

  4. You’re the second person in forty-eight hours to describe Christmas shoppers as zombies. A few years ago I was in an Asda supermarket and I was stopped in my tracks by the sight of a several towers – and I mean towers – of Coca Cola bottles. The sight of them, the enormity, was the embodiment of Christmas excess and I actually thought about all that liquid passing through human bodies and off into the sewers along with all the festive food, for what? Twenty-four hours, forty-eight at a push. When were we taken over by aliens?

    1. Some time in the 1920s when the Second Industrial Revolution got going in the west, I suspect, along with planned obsolescence and annual model/design changes… Yeah, the volume of product pushed at us is astonishing – using soft drink as an example, I have heard of ‘large’ sizes which were actually bigger than the average human stomach.

  5. It’s been years since I’ve been to a NZ mall. USA ones can be fun, since they are on a vast scale and have quality retailers, but who wants to waste his time on a suburban big box anchored on a crummy supermarket supported by Deeck Smeeth, Whitghoulls, Hallensteins, Supre, Factorie, Jeans West, Hannahs, Farmers and other clones?. Shop main street and/or the web!

    1. They’re all clones/chains – including the shops that find places within them. A complete switch from the retailing world of 30-40 years ago with its owner-operated shops and clientele. And as you say, something of a decline…

  6. I’m trying to reduce my Christmas shopping this year and increase my Christmas making. I’ll let you know how that goes over. 😉

    1. Please do! In our household we’ve started to gift things like ‘dinners out’ and ‘tickets to events’ and similar – experiences, rather than consumer tat. Better that than drown in a sea of broken plastic and frippery that gets used once and forgotten.

  7. Totally agree. Shopping malls are soulless places that suck away humanity. I avoid them too. Shopping online has saved me from inevitable doom.😉

    1. Our local malls here in NZ just got sold to a new investor, apparently as something of a job lot. Whether that changes anything I don’t know. They’re IDENTICAL, even down to decor, to the ones I’ve seen in Australia and I’m prepared to bet that if one was teleported over your way, nobody’d raise much of an eyebrow! Total retail doom, absolutely.

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