One of the great mysteries of the universe – which I’ve never really understood – is how everyday life always seems to kick up adverse challenges out of nowhere. I can’t ever get carparks or go anywhere that might form a queue without something happening to make it difficult. Every time.
1. I’ll often look for a carpark and find one that has another vehicle awkwardly parked slightly in the way. I’ll spend several minutes carefully manoeuvering around the other car and into the space. As soon as I’m settled, the car I’d manoeuvered around leaves.
2. If I back out of a parking space in a supermarket, the vehicle directly opposite instantly also backs out, forcing me to stop to avoid a collision. Every time. Every supermarket.
3. If I’m approaching an ATM or a customer counter of some kind, it’ll always be clear. As I near it, people always dart in from the left or right ahead of me, cutting me off and creating an ‘instant queue’ so I have to wait ten minutes to complete 10 seconds worth of transaction.
4. As a variant, sometimes I’ll be walking along a footpath behind two or three people, with an ATM in sight ahead. All of them, every time, are also heading for the same ATM. Curiously, this only happens to me – I don’t see any signs of ‘mobile queues’ roaming the streets to taunt other people.
5. I’ll be trying to cross a road on foot, or trying to get out of my driveway in my car, and the street is always totally empty except for a solitary vehicle that is precisely timed to collide with me if I don’t wait for it. Every time.
It’s odd how often this happens. Anybody would think the universe was out to get me. Does this also happen to you? Let me know in the comments.
Copyright © Matthew Wright 2019